Weekly Flecktarn Nights on Wednesday Evenings

Fleck Tarn Wednesdays

... are still happening every week

Lately it's been out in Garland in a barn, and i was the only one that was their to get it

It's still the same, I have to report on the dot in flecktarn uniform, get my wrists cuffed behind the pole and then they tie my elbows together real tight that I'm really tight on the pole

and then they take turns punching me hard in the guts for a few hours and knee me in the balls and kick and punch low too

In the last 2 weeks, some of the guys have taken me 1on1 afterwards back to the restroom thats their next to the feedroom with the fridge to beat me some more and fuck me, so thats new

otherwise same as its been always

Hunts in Rural Texas

The Texas Farm Bureau posted this pic today on facebook:

This is the same wide open land the hunts take place at. Last was on 4th of July long weekend.

Anyway...

New french CCE Field Uniforms for the next hunt

Original French Army CCE camouflage fabric, made to the longer and wider German Army field trouser pattern by a German manufacturer, the French CCE central european camouflage trousers are highly effective in European woodland and scrubland environments. The french fabric is a soft, moleskin type weave in a medium to heavy weight cloth with some stretch provided by the weave. The french CCE camouflage is a four colour with grey/tan, dark green, dark brown and black colouration and the camouflage pattern is wider than the US woodland camouflage with which is shares some similarities.

at the Hunts: Prisoner Uniforms

Uniforms of prisoners taken PoW after catching at the hunts, and after getting stripped, so they can dry

Flecktarn Feb 8th - now location

Last evening was flecktarn night again like very Wednesday evening.

Went direct from work, and pulled over at a parking lot to change from my work cloths in the flecktarn uniform and boots. After last week weere flecktarn got cancelled it was at a new place this time. Not even a dive bar but it looked more like a 4H hangout ... no bar or anything and they had the beers in ice chests. When I got there, only 5 other guys were there, i think word hadnt got around where it was and not many more showed up later, and my boyfriend didn't come either. He would have been ok for me not to go but Master Mitchell wouldnt have it. He was there and also was Big Joe that muscle black guy that hates my guts. I wasn't feeling too good when I saw Joe was their ... and he had that mean grin already on his fat face when I came in.

Joe waved me right over to him when I walked in and so I went to him and the first thing he did was punch me totally hard low in the guts so I folded and went down right in front of him. He didnt even get up from his stool. When I was down on my knees in front of him holding my gut he said "you and I we are gonna have some fun tonight" and kicked me so I fell back on the floor. He said to get up and then to sit on a chair in the corner and he threw a can of beer at me, which I caught. Lucky, 'cos else it would have hit me in the head. So I sat down on the chair drinking the beer and waited what next.

It is basically a big room, on the side of a garage/barn building, just like I said like a 4H meeting room. At the one wall were chairs all stacked up and a few standing around and on the other some folding tables, 2 or 3 set up the reat folded and leaning against the wall. 2 big ice chests on the floor with the beer and drinks, two solid square posts to support the roof, like 12x12's, and a few tall stools to sit on. The room has a big double-wide door to the parking lot and another wide door to the barn/garage in the back.

After about 20 mins, Joe and the guys drinking a couple beers to warm up, Master Mitchell showed up and said hi to the guys and grabbed a beer himself. To me, he just looked and pointed to one of the big posts without one word, so I got up and stood against it. I already knew I would go on the post the whole time.

Then after standing against the post for a while like stupid, Master Mitchell waved the 2 younger guys over to me and they tied my wrists and then my elbows together tight behind the post and then also my boots so my feet were more on the sides of the post and not in front, making me kind of hang against the rope, I didn't have a balance.

Then Big Joe came over and unbuttoned my flecktarn shirt and said to me "don't you love it when a nigger beats the shit out of your white ass" and had this mean wide smile across his black face. I guess it's ok if they call themselfs that, I always get in trouble for it.

Then he punched me really hard about 20 times or so, slow and mothodically, one over the navel and one below and so on and then 3 right upwards in the solar plexus. Big Joe has huge arms so his punches really hurt. I could maybe flex up for the first 5 but with that weird way I was hanging in the ropes and how he laid it in, I couldn't for long and then he went in deep. After that first round I felt pretty beat already and in tears but I knew this was war from over. The others guys were all cheering him on and laughing.

Then Big Joe grinned even meaned and pushed my chin up so he could get right in my face and look me in the eye and big big belly touched mine and he said "arent you gonna cry for me you little lillywihte fuck" and then nailed me hard in the balls with his knee and he got both really bad and it made me scream out loud. I had halfway expected it, I know Big Joe too good but also half not.

With that he left me hanging there at the post and I was retching hard. I couldn't even kinda put my legs together because they tied my boots so that they were on the sides of the post. I cramped pretty badly because I was just hanging their and it really hurt in my shoulders since they had also tied my elbows together. So i was just retching and spitting on the floor trying not to be sick. My balls were hurting like FUCK even tho he had only kneed me once but hard with a vengince.

They left me alone for a while, they were drinking beer and joking and stuff. I guess 45 mins or so? My shoulders were hurting really bad by then just from hanging their so weird. Then Master Mitchel told the two younger guys to go over "to fuck with him". They were at first a litle awkward like they didn't know what to do best so one of them took swings with his fist at my balls and the other grabbed some pieces of rope and tied them at the end and then hit me with the big nott swinging it at me hitting my shoulders and chest and ass and legs.

The Big Joe came back over again and I cringed a little cos I knew this was not going to be fun and he grabbed my throat and pushed my head up so i wasn't hanging their so limp and I could hardly breath then, and he said "now you got to cry for me baby like a little girl" and he started kneeing me in the balls and after the 3rd I was crying pretty hard. He did it about 10 times and in the end asked "want me to stop white boy" and I said yes please but he didn't. Then I got sick and started to throw up a little and he let me be and the other guys untied me and Master Mitchel told them to take me outside, and they did that. They more or less carried me, I couldn't walk on my own. Outside I really threw up then and they didn't hit me or anything, they just dropped me and waited until I was done and then they helped me up again and one of them asked if I needed a minute but I know better... best to go right back in. If Master Mitchell has to send someone after us to check that makes it only much worse.

I thought maybe with that I was hopefully done for the night. When Big Joe busts my balls he does it with a hate and so hard it feels he wants to break them for good so I was in really serious fucking pain and crying still. The guys helped me back inside and Master Mitchel told one of them to "hold the little fuck up" and Big Joe punched my gts a couple more times really REALLY hard saying "now you wont puke in my fucking face you little white sissy shithead". The guy holding me up and a hard time to do that because I doubled over so hard from the punches. After a few of those he couldn't and let go and I fell down hard. Big joe kicked me teice in the guts when i was on the floor and then let go.

They left me right there on the floor and about a half hour later they were done for the evening, nobody else was going to show up I gess. So they just dragged me outside and dropped me next to my LTD in the dirt, and Big Joe said "if I needed a good night kiss" but I gess I flinched and he laughed and then they all left. A little while later I felt good enough to get into my car and drive home (to my boyfriends place) but he wasn't home yet so I showers and went to bed. When he came home later too, he came to bed a while later and of course was horny like always and he noticed I took a beating when he slapped my nuts and I jumped. He said seems like i had got beat up good and said "thats hot" and didn't hold back at all getting himself off on (in) me. That was pretty wild, i was glad he got off very good but i didn't cum this time I was way too beat. But he let me cuddle up with him after he was done.

Thanksgiving Flecktarn Night

Wednesday evening just before Thanksgiving was Flecktarn night like every Wednesday. I was 20 mins late. We had so much to do. Like everyone was leaving town and had to get their truck fixed the last minute. I had like 3 people breathing down my neck to finish stuff up, even after we were already closed. Then I changed in my flecktarn uniform in my truck - no time to go home first. Thats why I had everything in the bag anyway, this isn't the first time. But there was also a lot of traffic so I was 20 minutes late. But there were only a few guys, and my boyfriend Josh wasn't there yet either. Nobody was tied to any of the 2 poles yet.

Just saw with the other 4 guys at the bar and had a beer at the end of the bar on the last stool. They left me alone and after about 10 min or so Josh came and sat with me, and then Master Mitchell and his Russian boy came a little later, and then 2 more guys but that was it. Small crowd, I guess because of the holidays. Nobody made a move to get anyone tied up. From everyone there, I was the only one that was in question anyway and the only one in flecktarn. but I also didn't want to just go and stand at the pole and wait till anyone ties me up and punches me. I figured I just wait and see. I just kept a low profile and sucked on my beer. Everyone else was talking, and so I just watched and listened.

Master Mitchell and his boy kept doing Vodka shots with some of the guys and they got more rowdy. Josh had gone over and sat with them. I was just sitting by myself in the corner. An hour or so into that, and a lot of vodka shots, Mitchell and Josh called me over and said if I wanted to get tied up and get my beating for the night. But then someone said they would have to get up for that so they had me come over to them to get it. So I went and stood in front of Master Mitchell but he wasn't suddenly in a good mood anymore and said I knew better than that. I didn't come close enough and I did not stand up straight and did not put my hands behind my back, and my boots 2 feet apart. I fixed that, and Josh pushed me forward towards him. Then Mitchell got up from his stool and grinned again, and then he punched me hard in the guts, right below the navel. Mitchell does martial arts do he can deliver punches. Of course I bent over, but I left my hands in my neck (I know better than be tempted to take them away). He grabbed my head and pushed it down a little more and said if I was ready to suck his dick and everyone was laughing. But then he raised up his knee and kicked me in the chest, that straightened me back up, but I stumbled backwards into the other guys who were sitting at the bar. They caught me and pushed me back a little so I could get my balance and stand. Then Mitchell grabbed me by the shirt (still had my hands up behind my neck, I did not let the arms go down) and pulled me a couple steps intp the room and turned me around and stepped back a bit. Then he kicked me full force in the balls, tip of his boots dead on. I tried my best to keep standing, but it was just too much. No wonder, when I have to go to his place once a month, he always ties me up so I can't go down. The pain was just too much, I went down on my knees and tried to breathe. They laughed and then ignored me and went back to their vodka shots. I took my hands down and held my balls and felt the pain shoot up from my balls. I was on my knees bent over holding my balls and trying to tough it out.

A couple minutes later Joe got up to take a piss. He is that big black guy who has it still out for me. Even though its been settled between us, since I don't call him nigger to his face anymore and he got to beat me up and fuck me in front of Josh. But he is always on my case anyways. So he got up and walks around the bar for the reatrooms and stops right where I am still on the floor on his way and kicks me in the side and says I am in the way. There are 6 feet in front and behind me, so I really wasn't in the way. And he kicks me again and says get up! and out of the way! SO I work myself up but I am not standing yet when he kicks me hard in the ass, so I fly forward towards the back and fall down again.

But he is right behind me and kicks me in the back and says why I am in the way and to get up. WHen I am on my arms and knees to get up, he kicks me again, really hard this time, in the gut. Fuck that really hurt, and I feel I'm wretching some. But Joe just grabs the neck of my flecktarn shirt and pulls me up with just one arm. He is a big guy, and my 150 pounds are not like a huge weight for him. Then he keeps pushing me, still holding me by my shirt collar on his arm, stretched out straight in front of him, and I am stumbling towards the back and restroom in front of him. From the bar there is laughing and someone yells to "bring him back and don't fuck him up in there" and more loud laughing.

Joe just runs me hard into the wall and then pulls me back by my collar and slams me into the wall again. Theh he lets go and turns me around and pushed my back against the wall and puts his left hand on my shoulder, so I stay there. Then he has this grin on his face looking down to me that I know all to well and asks where I want it. I know better than to say anything. He has at least 50 pounds of muscle on me and a foot taller. From all the other flecktarn nights I know when not to have a smart mouth, and I am not tempted to call him a nigger anymore anyway. It's just not worth it. Doesn't mean he still hates me and I get my share every Wednesday evening from him when he is there; a little more or less.

He says it doesnt look like anyone gets tied up to one of the poles tonight, but I surely want some right? I didn't plan to say anything, but he is waiting for me to say something. I was about to say something like "do it or leave me alone" .. but sometimes it helps that I studder so badly, since I didn't get more out then "d - d- d- d-" and he got impatient already and said that I was "such a shit" and started punching me hard. Joe's punches are like a steel hammer, his arms are as big around as my legs. His left hand is like a claw on my shoulder that keeps me fixed to the wall and from bending over or going down and it seems like its like no effort to him to hold me like that. That guy has so much power. Really sucks that hes a black. He punches me like 7 or 8 times and with the second or so while I try to keep my ab muscles flexed, It seems he is punching them right through against my spine and hurting my spine by squeezing it between my abs and the wall with every one of his punches.

The last one is going up and right into my solar plexus. That instantly killed my air and my legs went like rubber. Before I can drop down, though, he catches me and pushes me hard back up against the wall, and is like leaning against me, while I am desperately trying to get air in my lungs. After a couple of seconds heaving and gasping for air, and feeling my stomach cramping, he says into my ear "so, white boy you know whats next, right?" god I hate tis mo-fo but I can't say anything that would make it only worse. I can't say anything, anyway, cause I am still trying to get air, it feels my lungs are cramped and crumpled up from that punch upwards in my solarplexus. I feel Joe forcing his knee between my legs to open them up, and I don't resist it (whats the point). I know I am trembling and I feel it but I am still without air.

Then Joe rams his knee up the first time, dead in my balls. Oh my god! He is leaning against me with all his weight, and it pushed me up a little. It hurts so much that I suck in air being pushed up, but I can't scream, on breathing out, it's more like a whine I am making and I feel tears on my face. This fucking big nigger is doing whatever he wants with me and he is so much bigger. And I am almost hugging the guy, I have no way else with my arms since he is so close against me. The pain from my balls is going up and down in waves in me, my legs are total rubber, I am just hanging at the wall from the pressure of his big body leaning against me. He is working his knee again to get my legs open wide enough again, and I can't help I am choking up, because its all so helpless for me. And then he knees me a second time. I bet he makes every effort to knee me as hard as what hes got with his big legs. BANG! This time I scream out and then the pain really kicks in and I am sobbing hanging with my chin on his shoulder, and hyperventilating at the same time. I can feel him laughing at me and he is grabbing my ass with both his hands and like kneading it. The he puts his left arm around me and my neck, so my chin stays on his shoulder, and pulls back, so I am literally hanging on him, feet and boots off the floor, and still kind of hugging him, now more so he won't break my neck by which I am hanging on him, not because I don't know where to put my arms. And he says to me, like whispering in my ear, "so, white boy" (he always calls me that when there is nobody in ear shot, just because I used to call him nigger), "one more and you don't walk today.. your boyfriend won't like have" (yeah and he doesn't want to piss of Josh) "and he's gonna fuck you up later". And: "hmmm I would let you suck me off, but from you I'll prolly catch something." I am wondering if his dick is hard now, but I can't feel it one way or the other the way I am hanging from him (he is HUGE, one of the fattest I have seen - and felt as you know -). And then he says this time i get off easy and just lets me drop and I fall down hard.

With that he goes inside the restroom and takes a long piss and whistles!! I am curled up on the floor with the broken little tiles, and can't help the tears. I am retching, I am trying not to throw up.

Then he comes out again and kicks me and says get up, I have to bring you out with me, can't be having Josh get all pissy. You have to think of it like how the niggers talk, like ebonics. I can't write it like that. Just sucks. I can't get up yet so he grabs my left wrist off my balls and twsist my arm and make sme get up. I am stumbling in front of him again, with like rubber legs, but he makes my arm hurt so bad, I have to stay up. Back outisde in front of the bar he lets go and i fall down, on my knees, right in front of Master Mitchell.

And Mitchell says "hello hello hello we were waiting for you.. did you have fun in there?" And everyone is laughing hard. They must have done 10 shots while we were back there. And he tells me to get up and says I can't just have fun. I am trying to but I have a hard time to get on my legs, so he tells the others to  help me. So two of them get up, Mitchells Russian boy and one other ans get me on my feet and the fucking Russian gets behind me and holds me up, his arms under mine and then crossed in my neck.. so Mitchell has me all presented to him. Russian Boy behind me kicks my legs open and he keeps saying shit in russian in my ear. No clue what it means but I don't think it needs translation. Anyway, I get two hard kicks from Mitchell and with the second Russian Boy lets me go and I am just crumpled up on the floor holding my balls, crying, and trying not to throw up.

After that, they ignore me and keep drinking. I just stay there, even after the pain gets better. If I got up, they just get me again. After a while Josh gets up to take a piss, and he grabs me and makes me sit on a bench on the side and says "don't get drunk I need you to drive. And get a fucking grip on yourself." Yeah yeah thats Josh allright. No wonder, the way they have been doing shots, nobody of them can drive. Russian boy doesn't seem drunk at ALL, all the others definitely are way past it. The guy behind the bar isn't arguing he just put the bottles on the bar and ice. I am glad I can just sit on the side and watch, and nobody pays any attention on me. When Josh comes back from his piss, he sits next to me for a second and looks at me. Then he says "quit the crying you look ridicelous" and gets up and back with the others.

It's not too long after that, that they are tired and want to go home. LOL, Mitchell almost fell off his stool, he is THAT drunk!!! I've always heard never drink vodka with a Russian, but what do i know. I know the twisted fucker (both the Russian and Mitchell, which ever you thought I meant). The Russian guy looks like he's been having only water.

Josh comes over and says gimme your keys, so i do and he hands them to the bar guy and says to him to watch the truck or else. You can't leave a car there overnight or its gone or broken in. The bar dude roll shis eyes cos that means he has to watch it to put is somewhere safe but we are too good business plus hes too fucking scared to say anything. So then I have to get up and drive Josh in his truck. Good thing is, I get to go home with him :-)

Not that I feel much like driving, but no choice and I only had 5 or 6 beers earlier. And of course I don't want Josh to drive cos he is defo way past it. Outside i catch a backhand from Mitchell, and he tells me to be a good boy.

Fromt here we go to Josh's place. For a moment I was afraid he'd make me go to The Eagle first or some place but I guess he's had enough. At his place he just smacks me a little and racks me once and then we sleep. A couple hours later at 3 or 4, the usual happens, Josh is sobered up enough, horny and waking up, so he wakes me up and I get my share again. At least it's Thanksgiving and I don't have to get out the house at 7am like normally. Of course he punches my sore nuts but then he fucks me good and I cum a goooood load. Not the 8-footer but good.

Happy Thanksgiving!


.....

Thursday again and the Fort Hood Massacre

of course the big news today is the Fort Hood massacre. Crazy. When I heard it on the radio this afternoon of course I was shocked at first but then I thought of course Josh isn't on base right now but at the airfield in Fort Worth. Anyway there are 30,000 to 40,000 people in Fort Hood at any time so it wouldn't have been likely that he could have been any of the 11 killed or 31 wounded.



But you always think the worst. He was followign it close too I know and I called him on my break. Really sucks. But nobody he knows got hurt today. Thats good for us but of course it totally sucks for the families of those that got killed or wounded.

Otherwise my day was busy. WE AR TOTALLY SWAMPED. No idea whats going on.. maybe its the new guy that got Noah's job. I dunno but that is the only thing that changed lately, and the people even make lines now waiting for services and we have to park cars in the street! That must have been 2 or more years that we had to do that last. I flushed 3 radiaters today and did5 or 6 engine oil service and 3 transmissions, and thats not even all. Even had to cut my lunch short.. that was good though, first the manager came and gave me $20 cash if I went back to work right after eating (and no nappy) and then the custonmer tipped me another $10 cos he was waiting and he saw that I got back early on his car from lunch .. not bad!!!

Comes in real handy. Even though I don't have to pay for Noah's health insurance anymore so we don't lose the plan and I dont lose my insurance, I have to pay rent now that I have my own place again. If Josh would let me move in I'd be rich but hey he just wont have that ... the co-pay for my meds is still whats killing me

Last night was flecktarn, so I was a little queezy all day till afternoon sometimes. Good queezy though. At first they didn't take me, but the guy who got tied to "my" post didn't last all the way so when he crapped out they got me anyways, later. Was good last night.. I got gutpunched HARD for 30 minutes and that was it. At the end. Joe the big black guy gave me one hard knee in the balls.. I swear he always is out to break mine. But that was it and the guys were talking for a bit and I got to ride with Josh to his place :-) I figured he was fucking horny after all of this and I know him too good. I got my real beating for the night from him and he royally fucked my brains out.... nothing is as good as its with him!!! He didnt even kick me out after so I could sleep next to him. Of course like almost always he woke me at 3 or 4 for another fuck but I'm used that he wont let me sleep through. SO I had a hard time to keep my eyes open at first this morning and almost rear-ended a truck. But then it was so busy at work I forgot all that.

I guess thats all for today. I'm heading over, he said he would be later today cos of all the stuff going on down in Fort Hood tonight

Sunny Morning

Hi Everyone.

Just a quick one cos I have to go to work and it's almost 7:30. Sunny day today, which is nice. Last days it was always kind of overcast or rainy.

Tonight is flecktarn again, so I won't be on. Now just quickly checking the facebook and I'm off to work. We are like super busy in the shop.

by the way my fb is: facebook.com/kevinfubar

have a great day!

Another Month Gone, Face Book, and Flecktarn

I got my Facebook to work and am getting pretty good at it. Fun to make some new friends.

Time just flies... been a month since I posted here last and now it's almost 4th of July again!



I get tied up for flecktarn almost every week now. Last Wendesday was the first time in a long time I wasn't but I felt really bad that day anyway so Josh let me off the hook.

Memorial Day Hunt

This Memorial Day weekend was another hunt. I was one of the ones getting hunted and PoW.

I am still too exhausted to write it all up, most of it I can't tell anyways.

Just so y'all know why I wasn't online all this weekend.

Work, Jail, Life, Flecktarn

So .

Making another effort to write more regelary on my blog.

Called my little brother Reece today and heard my twin bro Clayton got messed up in jail. He went to visit and they wouldnt let him. Just said he got in a fight and hes hurt bad and in the hospital. That means nothing. I wish I knew whats going on.

At work someone backed into a tall metal tool box and knocked it over and it feel on me. hurt my left knee and leg pretty bad. Wasn't bleeding too bad but hurt.

Noah was horny and was wanting to fuck after work. I wasn't in the mood cos I was going to Josh's house and not get fucked twice. But I have to be nice to him. So we shared a joint first and he punched me in the balls... he knows I'm into this, I guess he tried to turn me on. LOL. It was a punch allright but I almost laughed. He meant it to be nice. He got off good though and I could drive over to Josh. He was done fast today also, he was already waiting for me. He fucked me till I was cumming real good though, so I'm happy. And he didn't send me away after, he is letting me stay. I'm glad, I am rather around him and not back at Noah's who would prolly want to fuck again. I have to sleep in his bed so either way thats the way it is.

Last Flecktarn night at the bar with the group I got knocked out 4 times. They really let me have it. and that after the wild weekend. I got picked for flecktarn night all the last weeks. I hope I get a break for a week or two this is getting to me.

I'm tired, so I keep it sort for tonight. Better short than nothing right

One more nasty thing so I'm done with it

He my bf was still kinda crappy with me after I was at Mitchells but at least I wasn't dumped and he let me stay over and fucked me. But he hardly talked with me so I kept quiet and let him do whatever. When he fucked me he tried just to get off and not make it fun for me but I was so happy he didn't dump me I got off anyways.

So the next weekend we went to like this bar to hang out with a couple of the guys from the group for beers and Mitchell was their too. He kind of parked me at the bar between some black guys from the army in Fort Hood and told me to stay with my ass on that chair. I didnt like being between all the black guys. This was just a social thing not even in uniform like always. The black guys were like all of them with bling and gold chains and all that shit and talking in their funny way. I hate black guys. You would too if you was locked up with 3 horny other blacks a little older in a room for 2 weeks in juvi and got beat and raped. They would even beat me up if i was gonna bend over for them anyways, just for kicks and beating up on a white guy. Anyways.

So my bf was hanging with Mitchell on the other side and then he came over and wanted my truck keys cos he and Mitchell were gonna go somewhere and we came in my truck. He said to the others in case they didnt get back in time if they would give me a ride home. Then they took off. He didnt come back for a long time and I was gonna go away from the bar but they said if i wasnt told to sit right their or what?? So I stayed I didnt want to get in a tiff with them. Then I had to piss and when I got up they said I wasnt suposed to and I said I got to piss from all the beer so they said oh ok but one of them came right after me. At the urinal he stood like right behind me, and I was thinking what the fuck but I better didnt say nothing. And then he says if I like black dick and I was a cocksucker for sure and I was like no I'm not. And then he was like if I was going to piss or what, so I couldnt just not do it and I had to really bad anyways so I got my dick out and started to piss and he was like right behind me. A foot taller then me abouts and he was looking over my shoulder and said come on show me what youve got and I told him to leave me alone but he just pulled my pants down all the way and said come on all white boys love black dick. This was NOT good, I needed to get this horny fucker away from me. When I was done pissing he turned me around and made fun of me and said haha white dicks are always so little but then he let me pull up my pants. Before he let me leave the restroom tho he grabbed my ass and said nice one and if I ever got some black dick up their for good. I just shook my head, that was about the last thing I'd do, tell him yeah and how much I hated it and getting into all that.

So back at the bar I sat on my chair again and was praying my bf and Mitchell would show up soon but it got later and later and the other guys all started to leave. So the three black fuckers left with me at the bar said we better get going and where I was wanting to go and even though I was wanting to go to my bfs house I wasnt sure if that was cool to tell them so I said Addison to my place. And they said hey if we give you a ride you're inviting us right and I had to pay my tab and theirs. I almost didnt have enough cash on me for that. ASSHOLES. God if I didnt love my bf so much I would of have never joined that stupid group. I always only get fucked with!

So we're out to the parking lot and they got like this old crown vic on huge rims. Old police car only painted in like a weird metal flake color and 22 inchers on them. And a real shitty lift kit, the wheels wont even turn much without scratching the fender and making wierd noises. This is like so stupid! He had to go like 10 times frowards and back to get out of the parking space. I had to get in the back and the guy next to me got like frisky fast. Like how much I was wanting to suck all their dicks and that for sure I was hoping to get all their dicks up my ass and get like fucked real good. All I said was no and just get me home but this got too weird and the guy was still backing the car out cos of the stupid rims and I was thinking I better walk home or get me a cab but after paying their tabs I had not enough for a cab but even hitchhiking would be better. So I thought I get out of here but then the door didnt open and the guy next to me saw that and laughed like really hard and he said dude child locks! And that little white boys get scared too easy of some real dicks thats why. I knew then I was in big trouble and when we got on the road they didnt turn on I20 to Dallas but the other way and I knew they werent dropping me off like they said. Insted they drove all the way to Fort Worth and then south and stopped at some shithole trailer park full of rundown singlewides. At first I was trying to say like hey your going the wrong way but they were all like hey dude we just party some more with you and that they knew I was like dying to ride some black dick and show how good I can suck cock and all that. The guy in the back with me got really frisky with me and tried to get my head down in his crotch but I was fighting him and they guys in the front were like laughing and telling him to warm me up a little and we like really struggled in the back. He guy could have just whacked me they were all big guys and fit with muscles a lot, all much taller and bigger then me. But he was just playing with me, till he got my shirt off and my t, and I fought it. When he got my shirt off he put it up front like a trophy and then same with my tshirt.

Then he was just feeling me up all over and telling the guys up front how white I was and a firm bubble ass and like wrestling me around. In the end for the last couple miles he had me like sitting on his lap and pushed forward so that he was like behind and over me and his arm around my neck chocking a little and my head between the front seats. The fucker on the passenger seat was taking to me how much I was gonna get off getting pounded by them and I'd love the party with them. Yeah right! fuck that. I was just thinking how I could get out of this and I didnt see much options ;-( I started wondering too if I got set up for this or if they just thought they could do it with me. But I couldnt see my bf doing this to me, he knows what I've been through in juvi and jail and how much I hate blacks. Anyway theirs no point now I got to get through this.

So when they stop at the trailer i dont want to get out and I fight them and trying to tell them I want to go home. Fat chance. They're just laughing and high5ing and saying the little white fucker is scared of some real dicks and all that. So they end up pulling me out of the crown vic in the end by my legs and I'm like really fighting them, kicking with my sneaks but their not getting like really mad its more like they get off on me fighting it. And maybe cos I couldnt really kick any of them hard enough to make them mad. So after they get me out they push me over the trunk down hard, two of them, and the other unlocks the door to the singlewide. The two guys like feel me up and feel up my ass and between my legs and keep telling me how much I'm wanting it and its just my stupid white pride that keeps me fighting it and no worries they'd help me get over it fast. So then they push me inside and that trailer is a fucking DUMP! Trash everywhere and I see a roach in the sink and tons of empty bottles and like half the lights are broken. They push me on the dirty floor and I'm lying on my back and they are standing around me and one says what should we do first with the little bitch.

I'm trying to get up and making a last effort to get out and run but they keep pushing me down. And say what a feistty little white boy. I didnt think blacks would even know they workd feisty the way they talk smack. So one says hey kiddo dont you want to strip for us we know how much you want to suck and ride real cocks. And one of them kicks me like a bit to get me moving and so I kick one of them in the shin really hard and I got him and he gets all mad and says you little SHIT your sucking me first for that. Its turning a little sour now and they let me get up and I say no way (and even get it out in one piece) and I want out. But they guy I kicked says stop this shit and get down and I look him in the eye and say no way and I get that out clean too! I'm really scared but I'm not just giving in. Plus I know how these people are. I've been through it too often they are going to fuck me over anyways before they get their fun. Its like racism backwards and they're doing it. At least I want to keep my pride. It still really really bugs me today how, back when in juvi, I was just trying to bend over for them to fuck me so they would stop hurting me so bad, and they never did anyways only I felt like shit afterwards cos I didnt even try to fight it. If their was anything I could do I would not just let them and I was for sure not just gonna suck his fucking black dick and FOR SURE i wouldnt be stripping for them like I was wanting it with them. No fucking way. I was scared shitless but I know how it works and I was really proud of myself how I was handling it and not just cave in like a sissy. Didnt make me feel a lot better cos I know what I'm in for and that it wouldnt be easy.

So then the guy that was behind me suddenly grabs my arms and pulls me tight, and the guy I kicked pulls down his sweat pants and strokes his dick a little and gets hard and says he knows how much I'm dying to suck this. He's pretty big and it makes me feel sick looking at it. Its not fair they got big dicks all of them, or most at least. All I say is FUCK YOU and I start kicking and bucking around. But he just stepped back a little so I couldnt reach him and I try to kick back, the guy that was holding me so tight, but he just grabs me harder and then runs forward like fast and slams me in the corner next to the door and hard! Its hurting my shoulder and my ribs, and he steps back and does it like 3 more times. That really hurts and I quit the kicking and I'm like a little hanging off him. Then the third guy comes up and he says you fuckers are all the same, putting up a big show and then beg to get black cocks up your ass and then you feel all guilty in your white skin. And he says to the guy thats holding me maybe we should just make him fucking beg if hes gonna be such a dickhead. Then he stands like right in front of me and starts twisting my nipples and says if I kick him or kick ever again he would break my legs. He is twisting really hard and I have to wince and I get a little teary. The other guy is really holding me tight.

The the nipple twister says if I'm now a good like white cocksucker and do what he knows I want anyways, and party with them and get off good or if I was gonna be a fucker that needs to learn how to beg and not make such a fucking stink first up. My choice. My head is racing, I'm thinking I get it one way or the other and maybe these three are different and their not gonna bet the crap out of me first and then fuck, maybe if I swallow my pride since its too late now anyways I get away just with some fucking and sucking and they use maybe rubbers too if I ask. Who knows what else they all got, I'm poz but they prolly have all kinds of STDs anyways. Then it dawns on my maybe see havent seen the plus under my group tatt so I say guys I'm POZ like thats a way out. They all just laugh real hard like I made a huge joke and the guy in front of me says he was knowing all I was thinking about was getting fucked!! It dawned on my that was a mistake to say it cos they knew I was thinking about the fucks. Damn!

So the guy says whats it gonna be, good white fuck boy or bad white fuck boy? I'm looking in his eyes, and I just KNOW he's just wanting to get to me. He is like all the other black fuckers with a white guy, they were going to beat me anyways and fuck or whatever. So I say fuck you, but I was also so scared it was more like a whisper then like really saying it. And he like YELLS in my face MOTHERFUCKER!!! And then he starts punching me hard in my guts, like so hard it pushes all the air out of my lungs. The guy that has his dick still out says hit low or hes gonna puke on the floor. And the guy keeps hammering. Its like getting a baseball bat rammed in, and low, belly button and below. At first I tried to flex my abs but I didnt last more then maybe the first 5 and then he is going all the way in. I'm like bending over and cramping up but the big guy holding me pulls me up tight and so I'm almost off the floor with my sneaks. Then the guy stops punching and looks me in the eye and says oh hes already crying! But I wasnt he was just making fun of me. And he says you white sissy boys are all the same, big mouth and cant even take a beating. And if I was now wanting to be a good white fucking cocksucker or what. I didnt say nothing just kind of gave him a mad look. SO he grins and pushed my head back with my chin as far as it goes against the guy holding me and thentakes a swing and hits me in the balls, and hard. I expected he would hit me in the abs again cos i was more stretched with him pushing my chin up and he got me good. I didnt want to but I had to yell out. He kept pushing my chin back and I tried to get my knees together protect myself some but their wasnt much room. The second one was even worse. The guy must be a boxer or something, not just work out a lot. I get my balls hit a LOT but his swings really got to me. I had to really scream, and I got tears. It really hurt, I was kind of coughing for air.

Fucking assholes thats no fair three on one. But since when are horny black motherfuckers ever fair. I would write something different for black onhere but I'm not sure if the blog company is ok with that. Thats what I was thinking though! And saying. I got like really mad cos I knew i was gonne get fucke dup more and it just wasnt fair. He took another swing at my balls, and it kinda started me cracking. I really had to scream cos it hurt so bad, it felt i was getting wet in my pants and i was afraid i was bleeding or something. And I really hated that I start to cry. The guy thats been hitting me says like with disgust see not even 5 minutes and the fucking sissy is ready to beg for real dicks. And then, so your ready or what? I was so desperite and mad that they got me like this. And also so fucking mad that now I was in the same fucking situation like when i was 16 and 17 in juvi and I was swearing to myself that I would never ever get in their again and with these kind of black assholes. And now its all the same over again! And then I was thinking, if I just gave in now maybe they wouldnt hurt me more and that was it already. And what my boyfriend would think how I should handle it, like what if he was watching? I know if he were like really their, he'd want me to be a lot tuffer and not just give up after like this. And who knows maybe this would get back to him somehow, after all these mofos are in the group too. Just cos I was so mad and desperite, and thinking about what he would think, he thought what the fuck to myself and said to the guy "YOU FUCKING N.....S" (I'm just not writing it here just in case).

Of course they all got really pissed. Got me 2 full swings in the balls bangbang, and then the guy holding me let me drop. Theywere like all cussing at me now, the usual stuff. When he let me off I was on my knees holding my balls, bent over but I didnt go on the dirty floor. But then the guy what had been hitting me kicked me hard in the side and they all got down over me and the first guy still had his dick handing out it flopped all over. They were very ruff stripping me and it was fast. They just ripped off my sneaks and socks and pulled my jeans down and off. They had me like totally pinned down. The then guy that was holding me before said if I was gonna pull down my briefs for them and show me what I got. Even if I had wanted to say yes I couldnt because of of them had his knee on my throat and pinned down so I couldnt. They took it as a no or didnt even wait for me to say something and one of them nailed me hard, like he wanted to squish my balls between his fist and my bones. I screamed really bad but with the guys leg on my throat nothing much came out. They nailed me a couple more times and I was wanting to pull down my briefs to make it stop but they had my arms pinned down too I couldnt move more then some fingers and could do nothing. I was ready to give in and do whatever, I hope my bf would be really proud of me I held out so long. I felt so fucking bad that after 10 years the same fucking thing was happening AGAIN and so bad as it was back then.

Then the guy let off a little with his leg and one of them asked if I was gonna stip my briefs now for them and beg for their cocks but before I could say YES YES YES they nailed me again. If their was anyone in the other trailers around they would of have heard me, it was a ballbreaker hit for sure. So I was like I do it I do it as much as I could in my sobbing. I was WAY over putting up the tuff act they fucked with me too bad. They all got up and I just pulled my legs up and held my balls and they were still in one piece. They were like so DO IT and then they pulled me up and said do it sexy or they really go and make me beg for their dicks. I had a hard time standing straight and they said dance and strip white boy. I knew I better or it be worse but it was hard to do. I guess i wasnt too bad for them but it was like really humilaiting. Then I was standing their with my head down not sure what next. And the guy that was holding me before came up from behind and put his hand under my chin and pulled it up and said if I was gonna beg now. GOD! This is like against everything but I thought I better get through it the faster the better. So I did and he was feeling me up and said do it like you mean it we know you want it just let it out and say it for real till I did. This really hurt bad inside to beg them to let me suck them and get fucked. They made me say I really loved to get fucked by black dicks and that theirs are the real ones and the only ones to really get a white cocksucker off and all that. THAT SUCKED SO BAD!!

So then they wanted me to pick which dick to suck first but I didnt know whats best to do cos I didnt want to tick them off anymore so the guy that still had his dick out said come here, and the guy behind me pushed me so I fell down on my knees right in front of him. He had his dick boned up and it was big but ugly cos its black. Then he said yeah admire it cos we got to get something else and he told the third guy to get the little box from the car. They were doing tina (cyrstal meth) but they were kind of short so they said your white ass aint getting nothing. I was REALLY glad cos Ive been clean over 3 years and when I saw they had tina I got scared to death they would make me too and I would get back in the same old again. PUH!!

So then the guy grabbed my head and pushed me down on his dick. Oh man he smelled bad! Blacks stink anyway but he really was stinking. Then he pulled me back up and said if i was gonna bite or just scrape he would knock out every single tooth I got so to watch out. I remember how much it cost me last time just to get one fixed that I got kocked out so I was really careful. But I hated it. Not a black dick and a stinking one so I just tried to lick his head some but I wasnt gonna get away with that. Teh guy tried to push me down harder on his dick but I was kind of pulling back and he said to the others the white cocksucker cant even suck right!! They were laughing and I felt one of them grabbing my balls from behind between my legs and crunching them so I really went down on him but he kept working them hard so I cant help it but I like flexxed a little and scratched the guys boner a little with my teeth and he got mad and pulled me up and punched me on the side of my face that I got a little dizzy and he said you already forgot what I do with your fucking teeth??? then he pushed me down again and this time all the way way behind my choke reflex and he kept me down on it and the other guy was still working my balls. I was getting panicky and tried to push off the couch he was sitting on with my arms but he forced down my head and didnt let up and I couldnt get air! He punched my head on the side again a couple times and said watch your fucking teeth! Then he let up a little so i could get some air and I got a full whiff of his stink and it was BAD. Then he fucked my throat alittle but I guess he didnt like it too much cos he pulled me all the way up so i was straight on my knees and he bent forward and let his hands slide down from my head to my shoulders and grabbed me real right and squeezed. He said you little white fuckboy first you put up the big i hate the n....s show and in less then 10 minutes your begging to suck and ride some real dicks and now you dont even suck good. And that I should better do it good or his friends was gonna have my balls for a LOT worse then before. And the guy still had me by my really supersore balls and really yanked on them and squeezed hard. I jerked bad and wanted to crunch over but the guy still had me tight by the shoulders so I threw my head back and I hit the guys head behind me, I really banged into his head. That guy took his other hand and held my head back and squeezed harder. I tried to get his hands off my balls but their was no way and so I grabbed his legs behind me to have something to hold on to. And he said white boy you better put up a good show now... he didnt say what the 'else' would be but I knew anyways. Then he let me head go and let off a little on my balls and I went down on the guy. I really tried to do it good but he smelled so bad and he kept ushing my head right so that his boner was right on my gag reflex. I was feeling I got sick, mostly cos it was a black dick in my throat but also cos he stank so bad and cos my balls hurt so bad. I didnt dare stop but I felt it coming and then it was and I tried to get off so I wouldnt go sick all over his crotch but he didnt let me and kept pushing me down. And then it happened, it wasnt my fault and I heard the other two yelling of fucking shit what an asshole, and the guy let go of my balls, but the guy i was sucking didnt let me off. He just slid down the couch a little more and locked his hands behind my head and he really started fucking my throat even with me puking still. This was really sick, and I got panic cos I couldnt get air and when I got a little suck it got puke in my lungs and cughed and he still kept going and then kicking my guts with his knees yelling watch your teeth watch your FUCKING teeth!! Finally he cums and just as I got a little air and I inhaled some if not most. He still didnt let go of me and so my head is still in his stinking crotch only now its even a lot worse with my puke in it and I'm coughing like crazy and trying to get air. Finally he lets off and I fall back and get on all fours trying to get air. I'm spitting his cum and some puke like it fucking dont matters on that floor...

Their all like disgusted and saying this fucker sucks and the thrid guy is like i just want to fuck him up!!! But the guy I just sucked off is laughing and he gets up and just throws the blanket and the cushion I puked on out the door. The he says hes got to take a shower (FUCK YEAH YOU DO) and I could suck them but they not really wanting to. I catch my breath after a while and just kind sit on the floor. I got my own puke on my shoulders and my chest and in my face but theirs nothing to wipe it. Their both watching me and I look away. I hear the other guy in the shower, I'm kinf od surprised the showers working in this fucked up piece of shit trailer. So then they two turn on the boom box in the corner, like really loud. Black music with like a lot of bass, boom boom. And they say to me to dance, and when I'm not like jumping up one of them is like pretending to get up like he was coming for me so I jump up which really isnt easy, I'm fucking sore.

Im in no mood to dance so I do as best I can. The tina has like totally kicked in with them now they both stroking their boners and the guy that was holding me at first either has weird pants that make his dick look huge, or he has a really huge one for real. So then the guy comes out of the shower and says fucking awesome we get the parteee goin and he gives me a quart and says dance and drink this. I'm taking a sip but he says I said drink it and he comes back and takes it from me and says open up and then he makes me drink it. He wont barely let me swallow, only when I couff cos its burning like hell. He didnt even dry off after the shower and he is naked. The other 2 are stripping now too and I feel miserable. I feel the booze run down in me and its getting to me fast. They tell me to keep dancing and with the booze kicking in some its getting easier. They say I should get a boner up and I try but its taking me a while till I got mine stiff. Of course their making fun of me. The one guy really has a HUGE one. Their just watching and stroking some. Then the first one says whos first and the third guy says me but I dont want to dig in his shit and they all get up and grab me and push me in the little bathroom in the shower. They are real rough and turn on the water to hot only and it is hot! Then they shower me off first like the puke and cum and its almost burning me, like really fucking close. I'm wet and their mostly too. They still all got raging boners. Then one screws off the shower head and I think their putting this up my ass and so hot so I try to get away and out of the shower but they wrestle me down and force it in. I'm screaming the house down cos it stings and burns like HELL. Their cleaning me out good, it stinks like hell, and when their done finally, I'm sobbing like crazy and I'm not fighting anything anymore.

They carry me more then I walk back in the main room and throw me on the bed and the third guy just gets like over me and fucks. I dont even feel a lot, my ass is burning like hell and he's fast. Im like desperite cos their not using no rubbers. The guy is telling me to say how great his black dick feels in my ass and I do it just so it wont get any worse but for real I couldnt give a flying fuck. When he cums I guess he likes it cos he grunts like an animal that he is and says to the other 2 fuck thats a tight ass for a white fuck boy. And he wants me to say how great it was for me and that I dont know why I was fighting is. I'm saying it but of course i didnt mean it. Then the guy with the huge dick. He's at least working it in a bit but hes still huge and its hard on me. My ass isnt burning so bad anymore and that guy can fuck. He fucks rough and hard but I like that anyways. I start HATING myself for this but it feels good. After a little while hes like see the white fuck boy digs it and he fucks harder and its like hes impaling me on this thing. Then he also wants me to say how fucking great his huge black dick feels in my pussyboy white ass and I do and I HATE myself for knowing it does a little. Hes taking his time and not just blowing his load like the first one and after a bit I cant help it but I get really into it and when he cums I cum too. I HATE HATE HATE myself for getting off on a black dick. Of course their having a field day they made me cumming. The last guy isnt ready for a fuck yet he blew his load already so their having me lick them and humilate me more and later they cuff me with my hands behind my back to the pole of the kitchen table foldout. It sucks to lie in the dirt of the floor listen to them snoring and I'm cold and naked.

This was going on all Saturday and the night and all Sunday till afternoon and on and off. Blowing one of them, getting fucked, they did get a little ruff with me in between or when I was too tired to be a power bottom but nothing like at first. I was wondering if my bf wasnt missing me and was dreaming about him coming to rescue me or something.

Then finally Sunday afternoon we all leave and i see the place by day. God this is even more run down like what it looked at night. They just leave the cushion and the blanket with the puke outside where they threw it out. Their just letting me out at the first DART station that goes into Dallas and at least they give me 5 bucks for the tickets and my shirt back. Took me like an hour to get to the DART station near my bfs house and walking the last mile or so takes like the last out of me. I feel like S-H-I-T and I'm like really fucking depressed. Its like I go in the same cicles all over again, I thought I was way over that shit.

I kept like daydreaming how my bf would be like all upset and feel horrible for me for this and do something about it, like within the group or something. And I'm wondering where my truck is, at his house or where. I see it parked nearby where I leave it always when I'm home (at his house) but he's not their and his car either. At least I find my keys on the tire and I just lie on the bench and take a nap. Its like I almost passed out on the bench the second I got on it. When I wake up someones knocking on the window. Its my bf. And behind him is Mitchells youngest and grinning from ear to ear. The kid is fucking cute and I hate hes blond too. But I'm trying not to think that cos its Mitchells son and thats only trouble. I dont think its any smart of my bf to hang with him.

So my bf says if im living in my truck now or what and he says you look like shit and hes gonna drive me home and the kid is following in his Volvo. On the way he says he figured I was gonna hook up with them and it went sour huh? I'm trying to say something and I want to explain but I cant get nothing out. I get stuck on like very word so I give up. He just keeps going about he bets I took them bare too and what a slut I am and I better get tested for STDs before hes putting his dick anywhere. I'm about ready to cry this is SOOOO not fair.

And THEN!! he says... see thats what its like if bad shit happens to you that you dont want. Like when you lie to me. And then hes not saying one more word till we get to my place and he just gets out and the kid gets out of the drivers seat of his Volvo so he can get in and they take off. I'm crying all the way up to my place and then i really totally break down and I swear I never ever ever ever lie to him again.

Puh. I'm glad I got this shit writen up and done with it.

Paying for lying

So just after what happened and in the park wasnt all to make up for lying but he let me in at least the next day and fucked me and let me stay over but he was like a little mean all the time but that was my fault. It was like kind of rocky for a couple days after and he said one night Mitchell needed to test something and wanted me over. That SUCKED, and I had like butterflies in my stomach and was scared cos at Mitchells thats always really bad. And it was, that machine he built now is crazy. He had me strip naked with is like really rare with him. Normalle maybe only shirt off and then he ties me up standing with legs wide and arms wide and up and kicks the fucking shit out of my balls. Not this time, just strip naked and lie on the floor between these big 6x6s. Then he tied my neck down hard to the floor with a chain and a rope around my ankles and pulled me up slowly, putting in like heavy metal bars between the big posts till I was all rolled around and my feet came down next to my face. I was looking at the soles of my feet in like a real tight back roll and with my balls right on top. Being rolled back over those bars really fucking hurt my back! Like it was close to snap. Then he tied my arms forward and that was stretching me even more. Like forward and at a angle so I could almost touch my feet. He just hit my nuts hard a couple times and then walked around the other side and rammed his knee in my abs they were just right in front of his knee. Then he just left me their and it didnt took long and like every muscle in my body started to hurt cos being rolled like this was really crazy. H ewas just messing around, I could hear him but I couldnt see him behind me.

This is really so unfair. He just always fucks me up really bad and won't even fuck me. I know he is HUNG, like 2 beer cans on top of each other. Not that I want to be fucked by anyone but my bf but if he always fucks my balls up so bad cos hes really ball crazy, a lot more then my bf, he could at least fuck me really good.

After a long time he came walking over again and I knew now it was gonna get bad. I just wanted out of their but I know its not like this. So he fucked with my balls really bad till I couldnt even scream anymore and then he said I got one other thing to try and all I could think was you fucking shithead sadistic asshole but of course i didnt say nothing it would only make it worse. He said he got a new stun gun, the first with 1 Million volts, and all I could so is say noooooo please - like this would have worked. He is so fucked up. He stunned my belly first and it was like my body wanted to jump and curl inwards of the roll he put me in but of course that didnt work. Tied to tight backwards and my belly trying to cramp up is just the opposite way but it felt like I was ripping all muscles out of my guts and I was close to passing out, really really close and I was hoping I would cos then I dont feel anything anymore. Then he stunned my nuts and I felt only this shirt crazy pain and a bright light in my head and I was out. When I came around my ball were on cold fire, it HURT!!! Like they were turned all steel and at the same time like on fire, really burning with flames shooting up and the pain was like spinning in a roll all around me from by balls through my body to my head and like jumping over to me feet and back up the roll to my balls. This was horrible and I felt like I was gonna die!! And sobbing like crazy, and I had a lot of spit coming out of my mouth, like really a lot.

Then he said one more time and I could go and I tried to plead and beg with him not to, I could not take it anymore. But for one he wouldnt listen anyway, for another whatever came out of my mouth was some wobblybobbly anyways. He was teasing me for a while and holding it out just to scare me more and it was working, he is a fucking scary crazy mean guy. When he stunned my balls the second time I wish I had passed out like right then like the first time but I didnt. It was a lot worse then before, the pain was spinning around that backwards wheel I was tie dup at like crazy like zoom zoom zoom around and my balls felt like they were cramping up too and I was like trying to cramp backwards into the roll like trying to curl up whwn I was like put on their just the other way around. After a bit I did pass out, finally!! When I woke up again I was off that roll, just naked on the ground, and outside behind his garage where his torture room brig is in the second floor under the roof. My uniform was on a pile next to me. I guess I woke up cos I got cold it was kind of chilly. Took me a while to put it on. At Mitchells its always in uniform. I was too sore and too tired to get my boots on so I just carried them barefoot, and walked around and my truck was their. My pockets were empty, but the truck wasnt locked and the keys in the lock and my other stuff on the seat. I had a really hard time driving I got lucky I didnt get pulled over for like how I was swerving. I went to my bf cos its closer and I figured he can see how much I got hurt so i was paying and maybe he would feel bad for me. His Volvo was in his spot but he didnt open when i knocked and didnt asnwer the phone also. So I had to drive all the way up to Addison to my place and that was hard. I am never ever going to lie to my bf again, not even for small stuff. Its not worth it.

Aftermath

so of course I knew I had to "pay" for Valentines and the great days before. That wasnt the reason though I didnt write for a while, but I got both the field telephones on my nuts for like forever till I thought my balls were fried for good and even the cum I got to shoot was like electric.

And got to be the sandbag for my bf and the punched my guts to jelly and then some.

And had to go to Mitchells, cos he build yet another new machine for his brig and wanted to try it out. I am so fucking scared of Mitchell but I have to go. This was one of the first time he told me to get all naked. Normally I stay in my uniform, or just take the shirt off but keep the BDU pants and boots on. This time he had some thing were I got bent backwards over a machines so I could almost kiss the heels of my feet and the balls were on top for him to work. He is fucking scary. I dont know why my bf let him have me to try it out it dont seem fair.

this is still the best one

its old tho but at least more real for whats like public

painting in arenas sucks of course. we do it in the fields in uniforms and if you get captured you get real tortured like a POW. the guys that get hunted always get captured

damn it worked!!

wow damn it worked. just took the object stuff from youtube and put it in. this one is much hotter tho. I got shot in the balls painting a bunch. from close it hurts a lot fucking more!!




in the group we only do it in uniforms, on the hunts. for executions its in underwear and tied to a tree

BBQ and Camping and ROAD TRIP Sunday

god!! theirs so much to tell and i'm afraid I forget a lot if i dont wreite it up now. I'm not even half thru. I'm so tired I could fall over and sleep right now.

So, Saturday. Its like evening and he's still not back from whatever he was gonna do all and I'm talking to my friend hawkeye up in canada online, like in Yahoo messenger. We're talking about Brad and why's hes never on and all and finally my bf calls and says hey we're doing a BBQ with the group and makes me write down all the stuff im supposed to get. So first I got to go to my place for my uniform cos I dont have everything with me and my sleeping bag. Then get beer, some lighter fluid, couple more steaks just in case, cigs for him, and a load of other stuff. I'm never so hot to do anything with the group, but it's not like I got a choise. I'm just so glad my bf is now my CO and not Mitchell anymore cos that sucked bad ass. As I'm getting my uniform and then run around to get all the stuff and not forget anything, cos its way out and I cant go back to get anything I missed, I keep thinking I hope I'm not getting set up on anything. All the time with the group, someone is getting fucked up and I'm kind of tired its me a lot. I wish I could of just gone back to bed, I'm soo tired I almost stumble over my own feed at the licor store and drop like one of the 24packs.

Finally I get their. I always fell asleep 2 or 3 times driving cos nobody else is going out their so late on a Saturday nite so its all dark on the road and I;'m so worn out and tired. On the way I pulled over at some gas station for some coffee to keep me awake but its been sitting their forever and always makes me puke but its so bitter it gets me more awake. Theirs only one lady at the station for like everything and first I'm thinking if she not scared all by herself but then shes so ugly whats gonna happen to her hehe. Anyways. So I get out their and first guy I see is this crazy dude Bryce from Waco and I think oh fucking shit their up to something. But its nothing, just the CO from Waco with his guys and Mitchell and some of the other guys and their like all in a good mood and theive gone thu a bunch of beer before I got their. Its all cool theyve been waiting for me, like all the stuff I was bringing along. Its just like a big BBQ. I finally find my bf, he looks so fucking hot in his uniform I get a boner again and stick with him. Its safer staying close. But I'm all worried for nothing everyones in a good mood and their all just hanging out and making jokes and stuff. Plus I'm really getting hungry, hadnt eat anything all day. I was going to stick with coke or soda but theirs only beer and licor. I'm not touching no licor cos then my bf gets all pissy easy cos he always thinks I get drunk and the next thing is I'm back on drugs again but thats BS cos Ive been clean over 3 years. He drinks some, but I've only seen him drunk like 3 or 4 times or so.

Everyone is just having a good time and then me and my bf crash in my pickup bed in our sleeping bags. I'm still a little nervus deep down cos hes def had a bunch of beers and I'm like thinking when hes asleep some of the other guys might of just come get me later for some fun. I'm trying to get really close to him and his sleeping bag. But nothing happens, everything goes quiet after a while and then I'm gone and I wake up the next morning and nothing happened.

Most everyone else is already up and its nice and warm and the sun is out and their making eggs on the fire and the Mitchell (!!) even makes me a ommelet. Wow this is real nice. later like 11 or noon everyone heads out and us too and we stop back in Dallas to get my bfs Volvo hes left their and go back to his place and shower and clean up.

Then he says hes still not heard from his ex so their prolly still fighting (his ex and the exs bf) and hes still needing to go to the office hes got to go to Monday so he says if I want I could come along. wooho!! ROAD TRIP!! So I call my manager on his cell and leave a message if hes ok with me not working Monday and I only go if he calls back and says its ok. Like 20 mins later he calls and says like go for it and so like 5ish we head out down I45.

This is like totally great!!! I'm sooo happy. Best weekend in a long time. Oh and my bfs Volvo is running just fine. Aint dying or nothing. I can see him twitch everythime the engine jerks but its him but hes not getting it. I'm wondering if I should tell him but then I dont dare really but then I just cant not tell him and the next time he does it I say hes got a nervus gas foot its him and when hes letting off the gas the turbo cuts out like its supposed to and its all normal. Deep down I'm kinda sweating it if the car is gonna die again or not but it aint.

So we're listening to his music and theirs like this totally hot track, like awesome fuck music. Its like over 45 mins and I cant help but I say its awesome for fucking. Hes just grinning and not saying anything. I cant help it but i'm getting a bit antsy and horny cos it like really sounds great. I gess he got it cos he just put his hand over, like casual and of course he felt my boner. OK I had a raging boner cos I was thinking the entire time the track is on how hes gonna fuck me to the sound track. So he just starts jerking me off through my jeans and we're going like at 70 down the freeway. I'm so fucking horned up I keep my hands behind my neck and let him jerk me but it was taking like maybe 5 minutes and I shot a big load ;-) Funny its just a hand job but it's like making me cramp up and I'm cumming and cumming. He's just like pretending nothing much happened.

I'm kinda dozing off and we get to Huntsville and check in some motel, a Days Inn. We're both hungry and theirs a mexican place right next door, this is like right on the access road to I45. Even for Sunday night its totally empty for 8pm and I'm hungry and tired. So hes getting us margaritas and this waiter john is laying the redneck countryboy thing on us, like saying yes sir to everything to him. I was gonna try and order but I see waiter John like all over my bf, like hes gonna fool me, and I cant get one word out right. So my bf says if I'd like the same as him. Hes so good not to make me look stupid when I cant get it out right. It takes like forever to get the food so we go through another turn of the blue margaritas and we talk about that waiter dude. Just for kicks. I saw how the guy was all over my bf but like so like he wasnt but I knew. But my bf says like the way hes wearing his jeans like low and like the countryboy think hes prolly a boring fuck. Not getting laid much so he'd prolly think hes getting some making out and like forever to get to the fuck and then it wont even be good and for 20 hes not even all that hot just like s skinny dude that sucks in bed. Its awesome my bf always sees like all the little things. So in the end he tips the dude like real good and I ask him what the fuck? And my bf says the kid is a poor sucker, not gettin any decent and now hes gonna be disapointed not to get fucked my him my bf so at least he could make his day a little with a big tip and we should both be sad for him. I swear I never ever totally figur my bf out!

So we walk back to the motel and watch some shows of law and order that he likes and i blow him some but then were just like tired from all the driving and late last night ang do sleep

THURSDAY!!!

Thursday started really good. I was late 5 minutes for work but as I got in, the manager was ripping Shane a second one, and like so everyone saw it. I missed the first part but I guess he pissed off some customer and the customer came back at opening and fucked with the manager and now Shane got it. Serves him right. At least till noon Shane is gonna steam by himself and someone's gonna get it later on when he blows.

Then his one lady comes and she always wants me to work on her car so thats all good and she always tips me like $20 when my manager isnt looking. I can't figure her out but whatever, nobody else ever gives me a 20 just like that.

At lunch I dont even go eat, just lie on my truck and when my bf calls like I thought he would, I tell him I didnt even go to lunch and he says good and see you later and hangs up. So I'm good to go after work tonight, and if hes planning something, I am sooo gonna get fucked, only theirs prolly a high price I got to pay. but hey, whatever. SO I'm like in a really good mood for the rest of the day, and even when Shane finally cracked and vented off, didnt get to me at all. He was about to go after the new guy but just then the manager walked in the back and he kicked the wall instead and really hurt himself. He can be a real ass but also real stupid sometimes.

So after work I shower real good and get clean in and out and lose no time to go to my bf's house. He's already home so I dont have to wait for him, and I can tell he's so def horny :-) At home he always just wears sweat pants or his adidas trainers and never a shirt unless its like really cold and I can see his boner going already. So I already know he's got something planned out, nothing much that can go wrong now. Finally ... I havent got a fuck Monday, Tuesday, AND Wednesday.

But he's all nice, he isnt just jumping me and beating the crap out of me or anything. Hes giving me a bottle of water and says to drink it and we go smoke a little on the patio and hes just asking how my day was and all. I'm getting a little suspicius, what the heck is he up to now? Thats the hot thing about him, hes tuff and always up to no good but like even after almost 2 years I can never tell with him whats gonna happen next. Hes like always toying with me. God, when we're just standing around like this and I look at him, I get weak knees. He has like so no idea how much I am in love with him and how much I crave him using me and doing whatever that gets him off. And he always likes plays it cool like I'm just some shithead fucker he is using when hes like feeling like it, or be nice to when hes in the mood, or beat the fuck up if hes in a real crappy mood. But like if I was gone it wouldn't matter for him. Always breaks my heart even tho I know its not like that and he's just doing his attitude thing but it still hurts like fuck. And that hurt is a lot lot worse then the worst pain he makes me suffer thru beating me up and punching my balls or whatever.

Anyway so we just hang out in the patio and I finally finish the water and he goes back in and I after him, and he heads back to the bedroom and like asks me if I need to go piss or anything. I do just in case. Hes already waiting for me when I get to the bedroom and has this grin but his eyes are like cold. Ice cold. I'm looking around a little but like so it doesn't look like I'm looking around to see if hes got anything out and I def have the feeling I'm gonna get hurt, and BAD. Then he says hey I'm in a really kinky mood and I want to try something and he makes it sound like hes telling me I have a way out. That makes me like really nauseus, cos I know this is not a good sign. And when he says it like that its like hes having like a little of a bad consciense but he knows and I knows theirs no way I can back out anyways and I don't want to anyways cos I know hes not gonna like it if he doesnt get to do whatever he's got planned. But when hes like that I get the chills and scared. Every time he gets like one of his really sadistic streaks, it gets me the best fucks in the end, ever, but its like I got to pay such a high price its always like I ask myself if its worth it. So I stand their like a dumbass and I'm scared about what the price is gonna be this time but he is set to go and doesnt want to mess around so he tells me to strip. I do, and not like normal when I rip my shit off when he tells me to get naked, I got like the butterflies going in my stomach and my guts all cramped up and its like my balls already start hurting a little, like they know also whats coming to them. And when I'm all naked and stand up, he looks down at my dick and grins some more, cos its like my dick knows this is not gonna be fun for a long time and is not wanting to be a boner. And he tips me a little so I lie down on the bed and I do, on my back and spread my legs. I figure he's going to want me to spread them to take a bunch of ball punchs like he loves it most. But he isnt and takes his sweet ass time to tie me up, arms and legs spred to the corners and real tight so I cant move much. Now I know this is going to be really bad, cos he rarely takes time like this, even tho I really like to get tied up, for him its mostly like too much trouble, maybe cuffs cos their quick and easy. So then he's got me all tied up and looks at me and I get a little panicky but of course I try not to show it and try to work up a boner but no chance. I know him too good, this is gonna be bad, and not in a fun way bad. I just wonder what he is up to, punching my balls even the crazy times, for that he wouldn't tie me up like this, just cuff my hands to the chain and padlock around my neck or so, so I cant try to protect my balls when I break down. This is gonna be different, and for sure not easier.

And then he gets some duct tape and first puts a strip over my mouth and then wraps 2 layers over it and around my head. I'm getting really shitscared now cos this is like rare. I think its only been 2 times in almost 2 years hes done that, so he's thinking I'm gonna try to scream the place down. Oh-oh. OK now I know I am FUCKED and its like its coming over me that he is going to really really hurt me bad and its also coming over me it means I get my brains fucked out, and FOR SURE!! This crazy stuff always turns him on like nothing else and when hes turned on like nothing else he isnt fucking, he's raping. Theirs two GOOD ways he fucks: when hes turned on like crazy, and when hes wanting it to be good for me, and then he fucks like GOD. I got fucked by a lot of guys in my life but nobody fucks like him when hes wanting it to be good. I kind of live for those fucks, and the ones in between are like the buildup to the next. But for both ways I have to pay for it, and a lot. Hes either gonna hurt me really bad or hes having a real bad consciense to make up for when hes thinking he was like really to mean to me.

So I know I'm sooo FUCKED and I know I'm gonna get one of his God fucks later for it, and so even tho I'm scared shitless, I spring a boner like bang! I know its kind of weird I get so scared, cos I get off on pain and all, but even tho I dig the pain and the way it feels, I'm not like some superhero and it fucking hurts, a lot. And he knows really mean ways to make it hurt, and he never stops cos he gets off on it the more it really gets to me.

Hes got me all tied up and ducttaped and looks me over and grins and then he makes a fist and shows it to me and slams it just once in my balls. Stings, hard, but one I can take and not make a wimp. And then he goes and gets those 2 old german army field telephones from like 1962 he got shipped like 2 weeks ago. I was wondering why he got those, I figured make for some stuff in the group next time we're out for some field trip or something. I didnt really think much about it but it kinda dawns on me now what their for. He puts wires on the 2 poles of one of them and the other end is like blank with no insulation and he is wrapping each end around one of my nuts and then puts more duct tape around each ball, like if for insulation so the 2 wires wont touch. Then he just grins again and says here's like a bit of training on field phones. They work just by picking up the receiver, cos they have batteries in them. And he picks up the receiver of the one hes hooked up to my balls, and I jump like 10 inches up with my ass: theirs a lot of juice in that thing!!! Wow that was a jolt, and it cuts my breath for a second. Its kind of hard to breath thru the nose anyways, cos my mouth is taped shut like really good. The he says but if you just lift the receiver, the other end doesnt know someones on the line so you got to ring them, and he lifts the phone some so I can see better and theirs this handle on the side to fold out, and he says one just needs to crank it and it makes the other phone ring.

And so he cranks it a little and I go totally BESERK!!! I'be had tons of electro on my nuts, hes even used a stungun on my balls before but this is nothing like it. Its like they turn cold metal and get in a grinder and the balls shoot out flash pain that I can feel in my fingers and it makes my mouth taste like metal, like when you hold a battery to your tong. I cant believe he's gonna use this stuff on me, and he hasnt even started really.

So he is getting started to work that crank and since I can see the clock on the side of the bed, its only been like 10 mins after he got going to when he stops for now. It feels like its been an hour and im wet with sweat, almost chewd through the ducttape, crying and in my mind begging him to no go again, I mean he must be really horny by now.. but I know him a lot better then that he would never let me get off this easy. And of course he didnt. THIS is the kind of stuff that gets him really off and he sometimes says I should he glad he isnt in that mood like every other day.

After like over 3 more hours I guess his arm got lame from the cranking, cos he pulled the wires out of that thing. Not that I cared about nothing anymore I was out of my fucking mind. This bad I haven't hurt in a loooong time, I'm a fucking mess and like way beyond anything where them endorphens could do anything for me. Absolutely everything is hurting in my body, my balls the worst of course and everything their attached to, but all my muscles and stuff too from the jerking around like crazy and flopping from the pain. The last 2 hours Ive only been wishing to pass out so it was over but he'd always go a little slower like he could tell when I was close to goin out. I'm like worn and a mess, if he'd stomped my balls I bet I wouldnt even have flinched anymore, their was like no power left in me for whatever. I heard this pinging noise in my ears, like sonar and like in sync with the pain in a pulse from my balls. And I wanted to cry or wail just cos it would feel like letting some of the pain out somehow but I just couldnt, I couldnt like even move. God he knows how to fuck me over really good. So then he untied me and ripped the tape off but I lie their like the same cos I couldnt even move and he sits on my belly and slaps me in the face so I pay attention, And he says good little motherfucker you still have half a boner going and grins. I couldnt even feel my dick and I couldnt think I would have anything but only a shriveld dick. And he slides up some till hes sitting on my chest, and I dont even have the power to breth against him, he is like pressing my chest down. And I stare right at his dick in front of my face. I know his dick in and out and I can tell when he is hard and when he is REALLY hard. Now it is really hard and I still think even then it is so fucking hot that even tho he is so hard and turned on his skin still goes over the head (cos hes uncut). So now I'm getting what I had to earn so fucking hard, and I hope I'm not gonna pass out. I know this sounds like real stupid, first I want to pass out and then I don't. I guess I cant make up my mind.

He wants me to turn over cos he likes it doggy the most and he said once he likes it cos its more humiliating for the guys thats getting fucked. It's hot but I like to see him when he fucks me but of course I could never tell him that plus it's not so much his thing. I can't move really, I tried to get up but I couldnt even get my shoulder off higher then maybe an inch and flop back down. But hes now more then good and ready to get off so he dont bother much and just lifts me up. Sucks he's got to take the sec to put the rubber on. This is when I hate it so much that Ive been such a slut and a junkie and got poz. I WISH he didnt have to wear the rubbers and do me for real but of course thats over for my life. Anyway he rams it in and hits me with another knuckle punch in the balls that make me arch up to him even tho a second ago I couldnt even get my shoulder off the futon. I think it wasnt even 2 minutes or so till my boner was bang on and I was riding into fuck heaven again. He's like so awesome when he wants. He kept hitting me in the nuts hard when he was thinking I felt too good but that couldnt stop me anymore. Its what I had to suffer for so bad for so long all evening and after I get so FUCKED UP I want my brains fucked out to no end. This is better then any trip Ive ever been on, and its like after i got hurt so much and he rams his dick in, its like he's flipping my switch inside to "on" and get like a HUGE dose of the endorphens and whatever else. This time was weird cos I was so worn out and exhausted I couldnt even like groan or anything, it was like I was a puppet getting stuck on a stick and shake, and I was like in an ocean and go under all the time till he hit me hard in the balls again and I got to the surface again, and then go under again and so on. But going under felt like really really good. The last thing I remember was I came like crazy and the first shot made like a splash on the wall behind my head.

I woke up and it was still dark and I wanted to look at the clock to see how late it was. Ok this is Friday morning and not really part of the Thursday blog but still, kind of belongs here. You have no idea how hard it was to turn my head and look, I had like NO energy, nothing, and no power. It was just 3:55 am and my bf was sleeping tight. I was like checking all my parts but pretty much everything just hurt and I couldnt move much and didnt really want to anyway. Just closed my eyes and was gone.

Ok the rest goes in the Friday blog, but I got to take a break and smoke and check what my bf is up to. He's been hacking like crazy on 2 of his computers, the ones I'm not allowed to touch. He's got like all these monitors set up around himself when hes working at home, looks like Startrek a little. How can you look at 2 monitors at the same time, or even 6? Anyways, I'll type up the Friday blog next and then I'm up to speed again